casualty of mind

Hi... just came back yesterday to my mom's which houses warmth, affection, not-so-hot food and of cos my WorkStation which had not really been working for almost amonth that I was at the in-laws'..

Also, just recovered from my old back ache relapse which had not come for almost a year already. Dunno how to describe the pain except that it felt like i was paralysed on my left side from my neck to my waist. It started off in the LabourDay weekend, just when i had lots of work to do like school stuff and painting the flat when after shower and whilst drying my hair, I heard a soft criccckk and uh-oh, at that moment I knew already the backache's back. (Last year I was on MC for 4 days.) As I didn't want to alarm Ibu(mum-in-law), I just chatted with her as normally as I could but kept my back stiff and I can't turn whenever she asked me to look at this and that.. It was all I could do to avoide crying my eyes out..I kept praying for hubby to come home from work (oh yes, he had to work on that day) and rescue me.. Ibu noticed my discomfort as she kindly asked why am I looking so stiff. I finally told her and she grew worried. She called hubby at work and hubby straight away took half day and told me to call my mom at home who was preparing to go wif the family for a weekend stay in JayBee. Mak was so worried asked me to rest and said she would pop over the next day wif Abah so he could massage me a bit. Ibu was worried too that when she went off to work in the late afternoon, she kept calling the house to ask hubby if i was allright, if i was resting or if i had eaten.. Felt so bad for making everybody worried..I had to reassure everyone that it had happened before.. but the worries ensued though hubby cracked some jokes but quickly apologised when he saw how much it hurt me to even laugh. I could not change position without help.. Everything from standing to sottong to lying positions had to be assisted. And as embarrassing as it was, I cried pitifully which further creased hubby's worry lines...

Sunday, my parents came and abah massaged me while hubby looked on and tried to get some tips in case it cropped up again. abah told the rest this was quite 'normal' for me as it happened before but expressed concern when he felt how stiff my veins/nerves were.. He even remarked dat my body was as cold as ice. Well, at least if the fridge were to conk out, we can always lay the food on me...

When Tuesday rolled around, I found that I still could not get up and phoned work to inform them. My sup wasn't too happy and told me I should have informed them sooner.. (?!) watever, i wasn't in the mood nor in the gd physique to argue. Went to the clinic and after waiting for almost 40 mins (lots of ppl were there maybe trying to extend the holiday, i would too if i were in the holiday mood, heh) I got 1 day MC. Even at that the doc wasn't sure what part of muscle I pulled. He subjected me to a series of grasping and stretching to see how far I could go. I didn't go any further than a toddler's grasp.. Went home, pop the pills and conked out. Mak called several times sounding worried and asked me to come back home but I didn't relish the idea of the bump and the grind in the public transport, even walking was a painful experience. I really am grateful for the pair of legs though out of shape and taken for granted most of the time, is still usable..

Points to note, Everyone from Mak to Ibu was especially wonderful and am touched by their kind concerns. Especially so with my terribly amazingly patient hubby who had withstood me crying like a baby everytime he helped me to sit, stand or lie down. I had even begun to like playing Xmen Legends on xbox which we did during my 'confinement period'