...

When you look at me
What do you see?
Do you see someone
trying to do better
to be better?
Or someone
pretending to be better
to do better..?

A day to remember

Supposed to be a good day. one of my junior cousins from the Kutty Klan got married…
I woke up on the wrong side of bed, or perhaps pms… whatever the reason was, it was not good enuf to excuse my behaviour.. I was a bit of Miss Attitude (chk out the capital A).. in fact it was inexcusable… very ashamed in fact for making such a hoo-ha of it.. Now I’m not interested in rehashing the whole episode, I’m just so embarrassed and appalled at myself..

Sorry dearest kuz, u know who u are…. U definitely did not deserve dat. I really intend to help, but all I saw was “red” dis way and dat and I guess, I listened to the devil’s whispering sweet nothings much too much, thus i made the situation worse. Sitting alone in front of the PC now, I wish, I wish, I wish I could turn back the clock and make sure I behave better… well nasi dah jadi bubur, serves me rite?

Even though u’re much younger than me but u’re a much bigger person for forgiving and overlooking my shamefully childish behaviour…

Moral of the story: I’ll never show myself in public until my Miss A is in check and out of the picture..

Mon ami's chain

(These are in no random order):

7 things that scare me
1. My laziness
2. Always forgetting
3. My habitual & an almost ritualistic prone to accidents
4. creepy crawlies especially when mai hubbi's not around to squash them for me
5. dark, constricted places
6. falling asleep and waking up mugged in public
7. being chased by cats & dogs alike

7 things i like most
1. Knowing He is oft-forgiving and all Merciful when I sometimes lapse in remembering Him.
2. my friends
3. teasing mai hubbi
5. playing & completely ruling over his Xbox games
6. junk food
7. MaK's chicken curry

7 most important things in my room- technically my would-be-shared-room
1. my ergonomic bed
2. my magnetic pillow
3. my huge built-in wardrobe
4. my handphone charger
5. the attached bathroom for late-nite crisis
6. the window
7. Its curtains ...'nuff said...

7 random facts about me
1. I wake up cranky no matter how short/long i sleep
2. the longest i''ve been in an employment was 2.5 months (short stint but long story)
3. I've an unhealthy amount of Shahrukh Khan's movies in my vcd/dvd collection
4. I'm my worst critic
5. I'm people's worst critic, believe me i'm the person you'd been warned against to be mixing with.
6. I love my family & friends & would do anything within the limited God-given capabilities to help them.
7. I've hairy arms

7 things i can do
1. By God's grace, wake up and go to sleep safe wif mai hubbi alongside me
2. I can paint walls...I helped hubbi to paint our flat, very nice & looks professional too.
3. I can finally wash our clothes wif a washing machine, thanks to abah
4. I can communicate more freely wif mother-in-law
5. I can clean fish though not so masterfully or tastefully done
6. I can walk past shops wif abundant clothes, bags & shoes on 70% discount without buying a single thing, not even a measly scarf that i know i have 3 years' supply of
7. I'm able to, with His help, have more time on earth to count all my blessings & remember Him.

7 things i can't do
1. walk without tripping over my own foot or bumping into things
2. abstain myself from chocolates more than 3 consecutive days
3. go about my day without hubbi's knowledge/permission
4. read maps
5. talk with my tongue sticking out
6. have regular dosage of decent gossip sessions wif my gals :(
7. tell people off outright when they had done me wrong. I usually keep to myself first and feel absolutely frustrated later.

7 things i say the most
1. "hubbi...?" (no contest here)
2. "what the...?!"
3. "i love you.." (yep, go ahead & vomit)
4. "what time you finish work today?"
5. "nak makan apa?"
6. "assalamu'alaikum"
7. "wa'alaikumussalam"

7 celeb crushes
1. Shahrukh khan (again, no contest)
2. brad pitt
3. will smith (what can i say, i always have a soft spot for a funny guy who sings)
4. hugh jackman @ wolverine ..
5. ricky martin (juz drives me loca when he sings in those smooth, sexy latino voice of his)
6. eminem (his bad boy image just appeals to me)
7. rosyam nor (an outstanding m'sian actor who has a great personality & character)

Met up wif MaK for some bit of shopping in bedok then we went on to meet aBaH @ Yaasalam for dinner last evening. I came from JW & MaK sportingly agreed to take bus and meet me @the interchange which she normally wouldn't do unless aBaH is driving. very grateful..Ordered a bouquet for my cousin's wedding dis weekend too.

Looking back, funny how nowadays I'm counting more & more on MaK & aBaH..well more on MaK. I could still remember the time I wouldn't be caught dead shopping @ NTUC wif MaK on tow instructing me to fetch dis & dat. It even got on the verge of taboo if one is enjoying dinner wif the said set of parents.

Well, perhaps MaK's recent sickness had slapped me the fact of one's mortality directly on my face. Or perhaps the recent status i 'd acquired dat made me realise - my parents are normal people who have considerably great insights on world events like the recent hurricane katrina. Or, perhaps my mom's missing me more since i'm no longer under 1 roof & she can't nag me as usual on my sloppiness in fixing hubbi's food & clothes. I could go on & on... Thank you ALLAH for all the blessings you've given me & my family. Please keep all of my family, relatives & friends in constant good health & situation. Please guide us in the busy-ness of our daily pursuits so as dat we do not forget YOU and may we always be striving in YOUR cause, Insyaa ALLAH..

a brief respite

Have's

been ages since i last checked in...

been like a crazed nomad lugging bags of clothes from Sembawang --->>> Pasir Ris --->>> Jurong W --->>> Sembawang --->>> Pasir Ris --->>> Jurong W ............. & so on............

been inhaling too much paint & turpentine from JW...

been scared to death when mak was having a terrible ache @her neck/shoulder nerves & joints... almost thought she might have to be warded in hospital when she could not even get up from bed.. cried buckets too... a touch dramatic but hey you try be in my shoe, seeing your mum like dat, and feeling helpless & useless being unable to do anything to alleviate her pain...

been to the doctor last nite as yours truly had carelessly cut her right thumb while opening a can of corned beef... This was my maiden attempt cooking at the in-laws'... Need I say more?


Have not's

been in contact with friends for almost a month i think... miss them... ooooohhhhh~~

been on honeymoon yet but insyaa Allah soon will be spending quality time wif my hubbi!!!

Closed For Inventory

Needed to think more, feel less...

Did something today dat reminded me of my holiday@factory job... routine, line production thingy and how i'm looking for reasons any reason at all to escape the drudgery of the mundane work. Went to the bathroom, ate a little bit, watch tv too but in thend, I resolved, well, i gotta do what mom said I gotta do or else... (you're welcome to fill in the blanks)

Oh.. Juz realized dat i've been goin on & on whereas had not really specified what the monkeyshine it's all about. I had been folding 200 plastic bags to hold chocs & sweets to be given out on the 19th.. Well granny's been a tremendous help by tying up those plastic potpourries of saccharines. It's no mean feat, I tell you. I believe two pats on the backs are on order for the both of us...

more to come...

Huwaaargghhhhh....

Finished re-painting my room in PR, okay not really finished, less than a quarter of a wall left to paint but I ran out of paint... used the no-lizard quality paint. My mom called it "cicak jalan jatuh" cat. It's a new colour like a light summer sky blue-turqoise...I like it, but i like the turqoise version we used in JW. Plain Brilliance!

I was enormously exhausted... hey it's no easy task especially juggling wif the paint, roller and trying not to fall off the ladder. I've been having this niggling pain in between my right eyebrow and my little forehead & juz now dat pain came back wif a vengeance.. I had to lie down and massage a little but the pain juz worsened and I'd half expect dat one of the veins had been building up pressure and burst out blood down on the side (no thanks to my vivid & colourful imagination). No joke, it IS major pain in the neck, i hate getting headaches especially when there are tonnes of things to do. In the end of tossing and turning, I popped some pills & slept it off hoping & praying that the blistering pain would wear off. It wore off all right, not much though & a fever to boot but at least I'm grateful I was able to lift my head up & jot in this blog now..

Kay, I need to save myself for tomorrow's newest (mis)adventure.. Aai, I'll insyaa Allah go to DA tomorrow and pass the cards there... Very truly, deeply & madly sorry for dis last minute thingy but things HAVE been crazy here... Miss u too!

was wif my sis the other day at Mac. Initial plan to keep her company as she's doing her work on her lappie. In the end, I had to wait for her for nearly 3 hours!! Nasib baik adik akoo.. heh...

While waiting for Her Highness arrival, I finished a cookbook by Nigella Lawson.. It's not exactly a cookbook and i meant it on the style it's written. It's exactly as though I was watching repeated broadcasts of Nigella's Bites. Very quirky, real-life, un-preachy sort of style though i doubt i've half her tenacity in using dozens of ziplock bags for marinating beef/lamb/chicken/birds... But what i like is that, the cooking's simple as though they're cooked up in mind for people like me who can't boil water without having the pot all burnt up. Well, it certainly has renewed my aim to cook for dear husband but i think i'll start on something small like peanut butter & banana on toast?? heheh.. one teeny step for me, a giant leap for mankind(not the extremely hungry ones, dat is!)

Two things i did learn though:
1. Macdonald has free internet surfing access..
2. Reading cookbooks in a fast-food restaurant is not such a good idea especially on empty stomach while waiting for someone to arrive.

baby blue

Just came back from visiting Hasanah to see her new bundle of joy..a girl.. the 1st is a boy... think she sort of has a complete set already.. I went wif Syiqin & her husband and the little Fathin Nadhrah.. already 11 months old and has 5 strong (& i do mean strong!) teeth. Very wary of strangers. She kept staring at hubbi and she hates spectacles/sunglasses of any kind. Hubbi tried to put on his sunglasses on her and she immediately cried out for help. Since then she kept one suspicious eye on hubbi... kesian hubbi.... try to coax her pun tak jalan....
The baby's cute, quite tall for her age @ 2 weeks' old. Hasanah the mother of course very radiant and she couldn't bear to put her baby down. But she dreaded the time when the baby got bigger and begs to be carried everytime.

*sighhhh*.. babies so sweet the smell...Is my biological clock tick-tocking now..?

The starhub-man can....

The *hub man came by this afternoon to diagnose my internet service(the lack of it, actually) problem. The modem only had the power lite on whereas a good hardwerking modem should have all 4 lites on as i was told. He has this contraption oscilloscope-cum-digital multimeter that reminded me of my TP days and checked every cable point in the house. He went outside to probe at this locked box which he opened with his own key then he came back quickly to us with a wry smile... "You got enemies arr?" We were shocked when he showed us that the tv cable was hanging out of its rightful socket. He inserted it back in and voila, internet was back on like nothing had ever happened.. (the TV was also having problems whereby no picture shown in every known channel. And it came back alive & kicking)

We'd asked the man, can anybody just open the box and he said only if he has the key which belonged to them people. The cable was seen jutting out from the box and we checked that it is quite impossible to pull it accidentally out as the cable end is the screw-on type... what could've happened? How did the cable mysteriously get screwed out of its socket? Which deranged mind could have commit such heinous act?? ok ok i exaggerated. But this enigmatic cable-puller had limited me from my unlimited internet subscription.

My mom quietly suggested could it be that I was watching TV into the wee hours of morning and maybe had the volume turned a tad too high and that might irritate some neighbours. And this neighbour happened to have the key (maybe he worked with the cable company) or who has a skeleton key (or maybe he was a locksmith) and pulled the cable out.. Far-fetched?? Perhaps... But then again, perhaps not... If so, ppl, beware we have a serial cable-puller on the loose who hates noises from TV even one that's turned up low. He'd do anyting and everything to deprive unsuspecting, innocent citizens of the box...

lenger punya kes...

One of the kebods (keje bodoh) of the day.

Was very tired & very sleepy.
Was asleep on bus 21.
Was definitely & absolutely unaware of surrounding.
Was aghast to find the tudung a bit wet with drool.
Wait.... that wasn't the kebod..
Was awake when the bus reached tampines but went on asleep anyway.
Was uber-shocked wheb found self all alone on the double-decked bus, and the bus was reversing into a parking space.
Was hurrying down the stair well when self unconciously wailed out "waaaaaaaaiiiiitttttttttttttt, unk-cleeeeeeeeeeee... i'm still he-reeeeeeeee!"
Was crimson red in the face as uncle chuckled and said.. " ohhh...upstairs sleeping aaarrr?!"

right...i'm able to recover my footing... however, all hopes of editing the blog will have to wait... i still can't figure how the hell the page are displayed in chinese language... e.g.:

在此文章中允許新的意見 是 否

變更時間和日期

??????????????????????????

watever.. nuthing shd deter me from posting in cept.. wait... Phewww~ lucky they differentiate the 'publish post' button..

pembawaan budak

Few times, I caught myself humming Barney songs.. A medley of them!! I'm humming them at work, waiting for the train/bus, at supermarket while lining up at the cashier till the lady in front turned to stare, in the bathroom while showering... jumping jack, what kind of spell had the purple dinosaur weave that even innocent unsuspecting adults are bewitched... The show ought to be rated! Tsk tsk, talk about work hazards...

Tired.
Frustrated.
Pissed off.
BIG Time.

I dun need this nor do i need to say more.

same boat

Rejoice world!

For those of you feeling like you're in my boat.. Or even for those who felt that I'm just spouting another load of screw-loosed, dispririted crapx on life, you may want to check out my link : The Layman's Guide To...


=Disclaimer=
Not for the faint-hearted nor is this for those born without a good sized funnybone. Not say I wanna say but dun say I never say...

all in one

"keje childcare teacher tu hapa?" my gran asked.. this is the billion dollar question.. org melayu kata, soalan cepu emas, 'cept the emas takder & the cepu tinggal habuk. While the technical job description is too technical to delve into and my energy is as big as a watermelon seed, the following shall serve as the most accurate, unbiased and fresh perspective from this newcomer of 1 month and 10 days in the field

According to Dictionary.com,
teach·er n. One who teaches, especially one hired to teach.
Well, I was hired as a Malay teacher so thanks a lot for the clarification. Reflecting on all the incidents happened so far @work, I conclude that dictionary.com is by far a simple tool used for people looking for simplfied meanings in this complicated world.
My work so far had comprised of and aside from being a teacher:
1. Nanny
2. Maid
3. Peacemaker
4. Feeder
5. Disciplinarian
6. Magic-worker
7. Children's rooms Interior Designer
8. Lifeguard / bodyguard
9. Entertainer
and to my aghast, which I had just experienced a few days ago,
10. Punching bag


I now look and feel like a war casualty.

ppl wonder what the job entails.. frankly i was wondering too.. wondering if there was any.. But when i was in the elevator after knocking off from work, i saw one of the boys wif his mom & dad. He wasn't from my class but I'd help in his class before so he knew my name (i forgot his!) He blew me a kiss as he was carried off from the elevator which was very sweet and the crowd in the lift were looking at one another wondering how come the boy was being friendly.. I blew him back a kiss and at the risk of sounding like a cliched idealist told myself that these are things that matter.. Not just to excel in reading, writing or counting but to love, respect and care for one another regardless of race or religion.

Hello! I wanna comp-rain hor~...

It is no picnic... Being a childcare teacher who teaches Malay that is... I thought I won't be overloaded wif stuff, freer time-table with intervals what wif the naptimes and such ..well, I thought wrong... No intervals at all not even a freaking chance to go to the freaking toilet.. Naptime was getting-together time - lesson planning and arrangement for the afternoon and the day after.. it's like a never-ending story. To top it all of, I was put in charge of the book and AV library for Malay & English resources... Wanna know where the resources are? They're all sitting nicely uncatalogued in black trashbags as the ctr just went thru several renovations so we had been hauling the stuff back & forth! My learning corner is still much as it had been all this while.. just a corner by itself.. ok maybe i have a few books and teacher made word games but i myself dun find its appealing factor, so i forgive my children for walking past it with not so much of a glance... at least for other subjects they have a standardized curriculum book so for those whose idea just refuse point-blank to appear, they can just rub the magic book and genie would grant the wish complete with lesson plans...I sometimes had to rely on my children's perception, abilities and sometimes, my own common sense. *gasp!*

Not that I didn't know abt the job and responsibilities of being a teacher.. thot that the 4.8months on the course whould have given me a little inkling on what to expect.. dunno bout this though I'm definitely taking this a 24hrs a day at a time...Now that I've totally lost my voice, my singing of the twinkle, twinkle little star sounds like the blardee meteor hitting planet earth..sheesh~...

Kick me!

Yup..kick me behind.. how in the world had i forgotten bout today? Eessh~ I just realized it when suria was on, blaring and the famous ct was conveying Happy Mother's Day wish and everything... My mom from the heart of the kitchen replied not-too-pointedly: "Terima kasih, Siti...." Yikes! I slapped my forehead then me, Anah & Munirah raced to Mak and all of us enveloped her in a club sandwich hug..

Sorry Mak..but isn't it true that every day should be a mother's day where we love, respect, emphatize, treat her as the Main Lady in our lives.. No matter wat I love you... yeah i don't say it often perhaps but I do love you... You're simply irressistable like an ultimate super sundae cooling the throat on a hot sweltering afternoon.. the very balm for our very red, very gritty and very sore eyes, yeps, even when u're extremely frustrated that none of us would pick up after ourselves properly.. You're the absolute best!